Family legacies are often supported with pride and anticipation, with each generation carrying forward the dreams and traditions of those who came before. But what happens when the next generation refuses to take on this role? This was the dilemma faced by one mother regarding her daughter.
As a member of Gen X, I find myself burdened by the responsibilities that millennials are rejecting. At 42, I am left grappling with the choices of my 22-year-old daughter, who decided she does not want children and plans to undergo sterilization next year.
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However, the souls destined to join our family for ancestral or karmic reasons still need to be born. Consequently, I am raising two babies who should have been hers, but canât be because she chose not to have kids.
We joke that my 1.5-year-old daughter â her sibling â is actually hers, but deep down, itâs not a joke. If she wasnât so unwilling, I wouldnât be raising a toddler right now.
But people couldnât be on her side.
- âI need to start using this excuse. I didnât want to binge 15 tacos. But you didnât do it, so I had to for our ancestral spirits. Why am I eating sausages? You know why.â IanFortey / Twitter
- âGood grief! This is so not a Gen X position. Weâre like, please donât have kids if you are not flipping ready, even if thatâs never!â RoseCastro / Twitter
- âI was mocked as a kid, so have really bad associations with children. My mother and I had a toxic relationship, and my parenting imprinting was bad. I donât have a lifestyle that lends itself to kids. Happily married, a guy who never wanted kids either.
We rescue dogs. It would be the height of selfishness to have a child, whoâd have to go through years of therapy fixing what we went wrong. So thankful Iâm now over 50 and people have stopped asking and designated me as the black sheep of the family.â SevereSociety / Twitter
- âYeah, itâs definitely the daughter whoâs selfish, lol.â uncle_authority / Twitter
- âOkay, thatâs just...weird. My daughter is 42 and chose not to have children. Uh, no... I never, ever thought about making more babies to âcompensate.ââ LeeAnneAyres1 / Twitter
- âThis isnât how most Gen X think. That they want to be a parent again at 40 is their decision, donât blame it on their kid, who knows sheâs not going to be a good mother.â Dranemra / Twitter
- âIâm Gen X, but DEFINITELY not a boomer yet. BUT WOW, as someone in the mental health field... Those last two sentences. She has her life: hope, dreams, etc. The daughter has her wants, needs, and goals for the future. Just be happy that sheâs happy.â L0vexxMuzik / Twitter
- âEvery single day, I learn more and more things that make me want to never interact with another person again.â KittyduJour / Twitter
- âTo think, I could have been using this excuse for decades when I eat way too much.â TheSylvreWolfe / Twitter
Navigating the complexities of family expectations and personal desires is never straightforward. Her journey to preserve the family legacy has been filled with both triumphs and heartaches. Though the future may look different from what she once imagined, we hope it is still filled with hope, love, and the enduring spirit of their family.
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